PERFORMANCES OF ALL KINDS

Southbank Outside Arts

Grab a seat on the Astroturf lawn outside the National Theatre and prepare to be enthralled by the annual summer festival. There are more than 150 free performances of global music, dance, circus acts -- and everything in-between.

From 10 p.m. -1 a.m on Friday and Saturday nights, come for the Late Lounge in the Terrace Café, where London’s top DJs will spin and mix any vinyl, CDs or mp3s that you bring.

There is music and theatre every themed week, whether it’s Cuban salsa kings or Ghanaian guitarists. The final week is a throwback mix of film noir, swing bands and Latin music.

Opening weekend, July 6th, celebrated the London debut of the Tour de France, with a bicycle ballet, musicians jamming on bikes and a rousing match of unicycle hockey.

For theatre, the second week raised awareness about water poverty, with water-themed vaudeville-circus acts and a riveting theatre piece with explosions and stunts aboard a pirate ship. It’s like Jack Sparrow with a social conscience.

The third week hosts a drama troupe from Poland who will perform a gripping adaptation of “Heart of Darkness,” the book that inspired the film “Apocalypse Now.” The fourth week includes giant puppet dragons and dinosaurs, and a workshop that will teach you the basics of circus performing.

The best bets for dance are in weeks seven and eight. The Rag Roof Theatre will perform a toe-tapping trip through dance crazes of the 1920s-1950s, and a breakdance crew will perform a bank heist where vaults are opened with the power of popping and locking. It’s also your chance to learn any dance -- from Ballroom to Belly Dancing, from Bollywood to Breakdancing.

After the performance, take a relaxing promenade along the South Bank of the Thames from the BFI past the newly renovated Southbank Centre to the London Eye and London Aquarium.

Watch This Space
Theatre Square, outside of National Theatre
July 6 - September 1, Free
Underground to Waterloo *OR* Underground to Temple and walk over Waterloo Bridge
http://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/wts

CHEAP MUSIC

Death Disco

Death Disco is the cheapest way for any music fan to feel right at home, in London. Hosted by Alan McGee, Death Disco happens every Wednesday night at the Notting Hill Arts Club, a venue as eclectic as the bands it books and the fans that attend. Not to mention that it’s free before 8 pm, and only a whopping £7 afterwards. Add that to the £2.10 for a bottle of the house beer, and you’re already saving money – well sort of.

The music lasts from 6pm to 2am with DJs spinning in between the bands sets. Usually you’ll hear recycled tracks from England’s own JAMC and Smiths; but you don’t show up for DJs at Death Disco, and the unique mix of bands makes up for any lack of DJ creativity. When you go from listening to a violin and acoustic rock quartet belting out dance and power-pop, to a hardcore-electro band, What Would Jesus Drive, closing with a cover of “The One That I Want” from the Grease soundtrack, you know you’re somewhere special.

The crowd is nothing less of a surprise. On any night amidst the bar keep’s friends and locals, there might be a horde of teenage German tourists, or even a gang of indie-rock mini Beatles, and everyone’s packed like sardines and shuffled together on the dim-lit dance floor. But if the live space gets two crowded, you can file across the room and pull up a chair in the lounge area where they host the R&B/Rap night YOYO – no worries, you can hear the music from every inch of the venue.

For any tourist in London for a month, or even a week, Death Disco is a night well spent. If you’ve got a love for music and a couple of quid you will easily become a fan over-night.

Notting Hill Arts Club
21 Notting Hill Gate
London W11 3JQ
Phone: 020 7460 4459
Tube: Notting Hill Gate
http://www.nottinghillartsclub.com/

Really Awful Poetry: Thursday Nights

My fellow music connoisseurs: if you dig the jams but can’t stand the over-priced pretense blighting the music scene, hop on board and let The Good Ship bring you back to the time when the beat still had you rocking, regardless of the performers’ image. Ditch your Dickinson anthology Thursday nights and come to Really Awful Poetry to enjoy some real tunes and a cheap drink served by your new friends behind the bar.

Aptly named as a satirical stab at the elitist hipster mentality, the Britihs venue prides itself on creating a humble, yet creative atmosphere. From the weary rock and roll purists, to the recovering show tunes addicts - whatever your sickness, this bar/club transmogrification will have any music lover kicking off his or her working shoes in no time, and all for under ten pounds.

From the moment you walk out of the tube station in Kilburn, you’ll be surrounded by the usual suspects: greasy take-away chains and the same pub you swore you just passed three seconds ago. A quick three-minute walk down Kilburn Street, however, and you’ll find The Good Ship painted on the side of a brick building; finally, an innovative light at the end of the stale ale, shish-kebab tunnel.

Inside, you’re bound to immediately find live music – an assortment of rock, indie, punk, and electronica – but if a band is in between sets, you can always bond with some strangers over your favorite album (that you’re sure to find in their one-hundred plus CD juke box). Or, if you prefer, grab a beer and head upstairs to the backstage loft to chat with band members or watch the next set while leaning on empty guitar cases.

Adding to this highly accessible, humble atmosphere, the bands play on ground floor of the venue and frequently take the one step it requires to get off the stage and dance with fans. This is a venue that screams yes to real ales, real people, and real fun, so sail off every Thursday night to enjoy honest musicianship and comradeship on no other voyager than this good ship. (5 pound cover charge.)

The Good Ship
289 Kilburn High Road
NW67JR London
(020) 7372 . 2544
http://thegoodshipinkilburn.blogspot.com

Lippi Quartet

When you want to hear a well-performed classical piece, you could pay quite a lot and take the tube to hear BBC Proms. Yet on a normal afternoon, you could also hear a commanding performance for free.

Situated in a short tunnel, a minute’s walk down from Shakespeare’s Globe, four string players, The Lippi Quartet, perform well-known music scores to the passing crowd. They are university students studying music in London and they play free of charge everyday from 3pm-6pm. An open cello case welcomes donations.

Composed of two violinists and two celloists, these musicians perform classical pieces such as from Mozart and Pachelbel. Their performance is clean and passionate, they are no amateurs. Their rendition of Pachelbel’s Canon is concert hall worthy.

Hearing them is easy. Walk over the Millennium Bridge and turn left at the end of the bridge or take the Tube to London Bridge and head west along the river. Keep walking until you hear music.

Shakespeare’s Globe
21 New Globe Walk
Bankside
London SE1
Tube: (North of Thames) Mansion House, Cannon Street, Blackfriars, St. Paul's or Bank. Walk over Millennium or Waterloo Bridge.
(South of Thames) London Bridge, Southwark, Waterloo.
http://www.shakespeares-globe.org/

SHOPPING AND MUSIC

Beyond Retro has done it: united vintage clothes with indie music, spawning an explosion of London’s hipster scene. Beyond Retro transforms itself every Saturday (late May through September) from vintage clothing shop to concert venue for its “Shop and Roll!” event, hosting a slew of up-and-comings in the music world.

The musical talent includes everything from electronic pop bands to bluesy funk singers. So while you browse through their endless selection of 50s style print frocks and vintage leather boots, you can listen to the cutting edge in music, a perfect combination of what’s old and what’s new.

The retro vibe of the clothes is complimented by the free weekly concerts at their East London location on Chesire Street, allowing you to shop and rock ‘til you drop at the same time. Their “Shop and Roll!” event begins on Saturdays between 3 and 4 pm (depending on when the band gets there) and the set generally lasts an hour. It’s worth the trip for the apparel alone, so the addition of wanna-be rock stars simply spikes its edgy appeal.

The concert at no charge matches the stores generally laid-back attitude and commitment to reasonable prices. While you don’t have to spend a dime if your only intention is to groove to new tunes, if you do find yourself lured in by a particularly shiny pair of pre-used purple biker pants, your wallet need not be alarmed.

So, whether you’re into dead people’s clothes, enjoy indie music, or just want to be one of East London’s beautiful people, Beyond Retro’s “Shop and Roll!” event has your answer for total immersion in this city’s fabulous hipster culture.

SHOPPING AND DANCING

Looking for an entertaining, eventful afternoon in London that won’t leave you reaching for your wallet? Most are, and it is possible to find. London’s street markets are a colorful place to pass the time, but there is always the fear of spending too much money, even if we make the empty promise, “I’ll just browse.” There is, however, a host of free events sprinkled throughout the lively and vibrant Spitalfields Market.

Spitalfields caters to all ages, although there is a youthful, hip energy about the marketplace, making it an ideal spot for young people. One entirely free event is The Tea Dance, which takes place every last Friday of the month. Spitalfield’s Tea Dance aims to bring back social dance in London and is ideal if you are looking for fun that has a taste of tradition. You can learn the foxtrot and the tango or show off your moves if you are a seasoned dancer as all ages and experiences are welcome.

The Tea Dance music is performed by the Covent Garden Dance Band, which is comprised of Opera House Orchestra members. The dance takes place in Crispin Place, which is fully covered and so the event goes on rain or shine. If it’s a sunny day, pack a picnic lunch to enjoy outdoors before the dance begins. After the dance, there is still an hour left before the market stalls close and so there is plenty of time to saunter through Spitalfields, and there is no entrance fee to walk among the vendors.

If on a tight budget, often the inclination is to breeze by these street markets because of the temptation to spend money. Ironically, it is places of commerce like Old Spitalfields Market that offer unique and not only cheap, but free events. So next time you think you don’t have the funds to enjoy the market, you are dead wrong. The Tea Dance at Spitalfields guarantees a lovely afternoon of tradition and dance that won’t cost you two pence.

Old Spitalfields Market
Crispin Place off Brushfield Street, E1
Tube: Liverpool Street
Every last Friday of the month, 1-3pm
Phone: 7957 216444
www.spitalfields.co.uk

PRIVATE ART/PUBLIC SPECTACLE

Sotheby's and Christie's Live Auctions

Avoid the shrieking school children, and hoards of tourists that frequent traditional galleries by visiting Sotheby’s and Christie’s auction houses. Auction houses provide an opportunity for the public to see (and even touch), master works up close the week before they go on sale. Even if you do not have the money to purchase these one of a kind pieces, you still have the chance to see artwork by Monet, Renoir, Van Gogh, and Andy Warhol that will probably never appear in a museum.

The auctions themselves are worth attending and it costs nothing to get in. London's auction houses are enjoying a boom, and taking in a sale in what is now the art capital of the world, is an affair that will not be soon forgotten. The unique experience of watching millions being thrown around like pennies becomes a kind of spectator sport as anonymous bidders battle to claim the top prize. Although only one can walk away the victor, potentially hiding his prize forever.

Due to a lack of high roller skyboxes in the saleroom, auctions give the public a chance to rub elbows with London’s high society (the people holding bid paddles), including celebrities like Tracey Emin and Johnny Depp.

Daytime sales are more casual and less crowded than evening sales which tend to be a social event, almost always requiring pre-booked tickets (gown not required, but don’t be surprised if there are a few in the audience). For evening sales, it is important to remember to bring a pen for the lot card given before entering the auction room, which allows the audience to follow the progression of the sale.

Also remember to grab a complimentary bottle of water on the way into the auction room, you will need it to cool down after the thrilling bidding battles! It can be extremely exciting to see a piece by Francis Bacon sell for forty-three million dollars, nearly twenty-six million dollars above the estimated price. Important collectible pieces usually get caught in the middle of a bidding battle between people in the saleroom and anonymous bidders, calling in from all over the world. Fierce bidding battles are marked with gasps, and rewarded with the sounds of bejewelled hands clapping when the gavel finally falls.

Although the task of wiggling into the main room my seem daunting at times, those who would rather avoid the crowds and still enjoy the excitement need only take a few steps back to watch the action happen over the multiple television screens. Check websites to keep up to date on future auctions because they are sporadic. There are usually no auctions during the month of August and sales are generally held on weekdays.

Sotheby’s
34-35 New Bond Street, London W1A 2AA.
Phone: +44 20 7293 5000
www.sothebys.com

Christie’s
85 Old Brompton Road, London SW7 3LD.
Phone: +44 (0)20 7930 6074

8 King Street, St. James's London SW1Y 6QT.
Phone: +44 (0)20 7839 9060
www.christies.com

WORKING OUT

Basketball Night at Crystal Palace National Sports Centre

Missing the pickup basketball games you're used to playing with friends back home? The HOSANA Ballers evenings are the London solution. Hop on the National Rail Service from London Bridge to the Crystal Palace stop. Up the hill and to the right is the National Sports Centre. Be sure to arrive early, the Crystal Palace area, though certainly missing the same charm that made it such a landmark in the 1800's, is still beautiful. The lawns make for a terrific walk away from any of the London rush. Try to get a good view of the football field; you might be lucky enough to catch some practice in action.

Once you make it past the front desk, take up your position of choice. If you just want to watch, stay on the floor above the courts for the best view. It's free to watch and the three courts are always featuring games, making it impossible for a dull minute to exist. The court closest to the entrance is the Pro/College Level court and features many players from top collegiate basketball programs or professional leagues in both the United States and Europe so play is guaranteed to be competitive and entertaining. The Lady Baller court is no less impressive. Moreover, if there is a lull for whatever reason the music keeps the atmosphere fun the entire time by playing lots of loud hip-hop and rap.

If you want to play, toss ₤3 at the desk by the court entrance and put your name down on the list of the court you wish to play on. The person in charge of the court creates the teams and sends them out as the losers leave the court. Winners stay on and losers are free to sign up as many times as they like until the night ends.

HOSANA Ballers Evenings
Thursdays 8-10pm, May thru August.
National Rail standard-fare ticket ₤4.60.
www.hosana.co.uk for more information.

Ye Olde Swimming Hole

Lovingly ignore your great aunt’s advice to attend the Changing of the Guard and put your friend’s suggestion of spending a full day at the National Gallery on the backburner. Instead, head for the Heath – Hampstead Heath that is. Situated in the north of London, the 791-acre countryside offers lush green atmosphere, unpaved footpaths, and vast open fields.

To get the full experience, tote along your bathing suit and a towel and take a dip in the swimming ponds. There are three bathing ponds to choose from: the Men’s or Ladies, which are located in the western section of the heath or the Mixed bathing pond toward the south. Two pounds gets you through the gate and off to your adventure paddling alongside the ducks and lily pads. The ponds are open from 7 a.m. to 8 p.m. during the summer months, but go during the heat of the day as the pond water is quite cold.

Along with getting great exercise in a beautiful, serene setting, you’ll also be able to tell all future London-goers, “You simply must spend a full afternoon in Hampstead Heath and go swimming with the ducks.”

Hampstead Heath
C2 To the end of the line then walk *OR*
Northern Line to Hampstead and walk further

CHEAP EATS

Beigel Bake

Here is a short list of things you won’t find at Beigel Bake:

• Pizza bagels
• Containers of schmeer with caloric information on the side
• A dazzling array of condiments and a promise to “have it your way”

If these are what you’re after, there are plenty of chain sandwich stores to suit your needs. Otherwise, head to Brick Lane—east London’s historically immigrant neighborhood and now the place to go for aggressively hawked Indian food, shaggy-haired hipsters in circulation-impairing pants, and bagels that are famous for a reason.

Beigel Bake “beigels” ("bei" sounding a bit like "buy" in local parlance) are the real deal: a hint of crunch and perfectly chewy. Plus, you can eat cheaper than dirt (literally--1kg of Miracle Gro runs about £3.99, while a bagel with chopped herring, a piece of cheesecake, and a soda can be had for a mere £1.90).

In American cuisine, bread is merely a vehicle for filling delivery, each sandwich asking an implied question: just how many animals and vegetables can fit in here? Beigel Bake, however, is all about the bagel. Order a cheese bagel expecting “the works” and Jo—tattooed and bespeckled, maintaining a steady stream of behind-the-counter banter--will hand you a bagel with a slab of cheese inside.

Feeling indulgent? The salt beef (aka corned beef) bagel is Beigel Bake’s most decadent offering. It comes with mustard and a £2.50 price tag (£3.20 for sandwich bread). Local institutions of their own right, regulars Mick and George will tell you the tenderness and quantity of the salt beef distinguish Beigel Bake from the competition (namely, the other 24-hour bagel shop next door). Mick and George can be found most days holding court on the folding chairs between the two shops, chatting up strangers and complimenting pretty girls.

For the secular non-New York City Jew (ie me), Beigel Bake is something of a religious experience—a first taste of food previously known mostly in gastronomical myth. Chopped herring, salt beef, strudel, cheesecake—I sampled widely in the name of research, even accepting a bite from a stranger’s eccles (a cookie whose lackluster qualities I later attributed to its WASP-y origins). But if you’re the average geezer, Beigel Bake simply provides cheap and tasty food, 24/7. When asked about other Jewish eateries in the area, one man replied through a mouthful of smoked salmon, “Bagels are Jewish, are they?”

Beigel Bake
159 Brick Lane
Phone: 071 729 0616
Tube: Aldgate East, Liverpool Street, Bethnal Green Road
Hours: 24/7
Cost: £.18-£3.20

Other Cheap Food:
In a city with no Hot Dog carts or pizza by the slice here's what you need to know:

DALSTON: Turkish food everywhere. Lahmacun is Turkish pizza by the slice equivalent. Pide is a kind of cheese and minced lamb pastry that looks like a canoe. Best to go to Mangal Pide Salonu on the High Street. Full meals at Istanbul Iskembicisi and Mangal Ockacbasi in Arcola Street ... fill it to the rim for under a tenner.

SHOREDITCH: A mile down the road from Dalston, near Hoxton Square is little Vietnam. viet Hoa and Song Que both on the High Street are the places to go. Have a bowl of Pho (pronounced fuh) Vietnamese soup.

BRICK LANE: Curry capital of inner London. Sweet and Spicy cafeteria is the cheapest of the cheap, and if you can do curry without beer the best place to go. (They don't have a liquor license)

CHINA STREET: (it's too small to be Chinatown): Garrard Street in the WEst End for takeaway dim sum: Char Siu Baos and so on. Lunch time special at Chines Experience on Shaftesbury Avenue